Sunday, July 29, 2012

What's an Avatar To Do?

A refreshing swim waiting for the Lucky Board.

It's funny how things affect each other.  In RL(tm), I can only wear the most comfortable shoes after suffering more than a year with plantar fasciitis.  In the virtual world, my avatar can wear, and indeed has many free pairs of ultra-high heeled shoes, but what do I like to put on her?  Yep, it's flats.

The heat is oppressive this summer, seems to be unusually so although it might just be my "power surges."  There is no temperature in virtual life ... but what do I want to see on my avatar?  Yes, again (golly, you're good at this!), it's shorts and sleeveless tops.  I can't imagine seeing her in a fur coat, wool, or fall colors.

So, Lludmila can wear anything in the world, but I continue to prefer things I would like: reasonably modest (no pubes, buttcrack, or areolae), seasonally appropriate, and not painful.  This indicates the amount of identification we have with our avatars.  Others may react differently, but we all dance in our heads when we watch our avatars dance - they are an extension of our selves.

So, it's inevitable that some of us might become entangled emotionally ... and here's what's been happening with me.

Yesterday Lludmila was out hounding some 60L Weekend bargains at one of her favorite shops and upon rezzing was assaulted by a script-nazibot telling her she was 18 scripts over the "line" and would be continually hararsed until she removed some.  Well, I can tell you, that gave me a turn.  I was wearing some prim feet and they do have several scripts in them.  I opened on in edit mode to count the scripts in one foot (while the script-nazibot continued to remind me and call me names) and "only" found seven.  I checked everywhere else and that was all that had scripts in it.  Then I looked around the shop ... I was the only one there.  I decided I'd risk "ruining everyone else's experience by producing lag" and leave the feet on.  It was a furniture shop - every dang thing in there had scripts as well.  Did they not count?

Later, in the middle of the Rebel Somethingorother Hunt, I arrived at a shop that suggested I check my script count by right-clicking on my avatar and getting a count and providing me a notecard about scripts and lag.  I was starting to get a complex about this!  Later I removed my pretty prim feet and looked into deleting unneeded scripts from them, but maybe I'd like to change the toenail color or add toe-rings or the anklets that make the join of the prim less noticeable.  Lludmila is not always Lludmila.  There are other shapes (and colors of skin) that are put on, so if I take the scripts out of an item, another shape won't be able to wear it.

I got all frowny.

Today, after larding Lludmila up with hunt prizes, I put the shorts and corset top back on her (but not the prim feet), and toodled off to get my weekly freebie gown from another shop.  Usually you are bombarded with notecards upon entering about behavior and appropriate dress, but this time there was nothing.  Lludmila walked unencumbered down the red carpet until she reached the group gift poster and suddenly there was one of those auto-messages in green about appropriate dress, aimed right at me.  Me!  The original and inimitable Unslutty Undead.

You know what that reminded me of?  Remember in school when one or two kids did something awful and everyone in the classroom had to be harangued and shamed?  That's what this is like.  Why does no one complain about lag at one of the functions we attend where everyone is loaded with prims and scripts and we laugh about our ARC?  There can be 20 of us, all dancing and carrying on and waiting for things to rez.  How is that different from 18 scripts over the line at an empty shop?

Maybe I'm so used to lag that it doesn't mean anything to me, I dunno.  But I do know this, and it may be just me, lag doesn't bother me nearly as much as being shamed when I enter a shop.  You know what, though?  I don't have to go back.*

Fully clothed - but naming no names.

  *Not that I'd be missed at some shops ... where I've never bought anything but just accumulate freebies (but I do post photos and blog about them).

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